---
{"title": "How to get help with unfamiliar requests for memory loss", "description": "A step by step way for a person with memory loss and their family to get a clear, safe explanation of unfamiliar requests, and tools that can help.", "url": "https://cleverdings.com/how-to-get-help-with-unfamiliar-requests-for-people-with-memory-loss/", "date": "2026-10-26"}
---
A step by step way for a person with memory loss and their family to get a clear, safe explanation of unfamiliar requests, and tools that can help.

Keep the unfamiliar request in a form you can show, like a letter or paper, and ask a person you trust to read it with you. A tool such as Postal Buddy can explain a letter in big print and out loud, but a person you trust still decides what to do.

| Option | What it does | Cost |
|---|---|---|
| Postal Buddy | Explains a letter you photograph in big print and out loud, shows a bill's sender, amount and due date, and for a suspected scam says not to pay or call the number on it. [^1] [^1] [^1] | The senior's side is free forever; Plus costs $9.99 a month or $79 a year, with a 30-day Plus trial and no card needed when the first helper joins. [^1] |
| A person you trust | Not published here; agree who can be reached when a request arrives and how the explanation is given. | Not published |
| Elder services or dementia support office | Not published here; check whether it offers counseling or a caseworker, and whether an appointment is needed. | Not published |
| A social worker or care manager | Not published here; check who can explain a request and be reached when one comes in. | Not published |

## What you need before you start

Most of the work is getting the unfamiliar request into a form someone else can look at. A letter or paper you can hold and photograph works best.

Keep the request in one place, like a paper tray or a folder, so it does not get lost. Write the date it arrived and who sent it, if you can read it. If the request comes by phone, ask the caller to spell the name and number again, or ask that it be sent in writing.

Agree, while you are not under pressure, which person you trust to sit with you when a request comes in. That person should be someone who can be reached, and who explains things the way you want: out loud, in big print, or both. The person with memory loss should agree to asking for help, because the help works best when they want it.

Keep full account numbers and personal details off shared notes. Ask the trusted person to keep them safe, and only share them with someone who is helping with the specific request.

## Step by step

1. **Put the request where you can see it.** Set it aside by itself, not mixed with other papers.
2. **Find who sent it.** Look at the top or the back of the letter for a name, an address or a number.
3. **See what it asks for.** Read for words about money, a signature, a meeting or a deadline.
4. **Set aside anything asking for money.** Do not pay, sign or give details until your trusted person has looked.
5. **Ask for the explanation you want.** Have the trusted person tell you what the request says, and say it again if you need to.
6. **Do not call a number written on a request you do not know.** Find the number yourself from a statement you already trust or the official website.
7. **For a bill, note the sender, the amount and the date it is due.** Write these down so they are not forgotten.
8. **Keep a record.** Write what the request was, what was decided, and what to do next, with the date.
9. **Ask for the request in writing when it comes by phone or in person.** A form you can keep is easier to explain than a conversation.

## Tools that can do it

Several kinds of help fit this job. Pick based on how much typing you want to do and whether you also want a person to talk to.

**A person you trust.** Ask a family member, friend or neighbor to sit with you when a request arrives. Agree ahead of time who can be reached, and how the explanation should be given.

**A local elder services or dementia support office.** Many areas have an office that helps older adults and their families. Check whether it offers counseling or a caseworker, and whether an appointment is needed.

**A social worker or care manager.** Check who can explain a request and be reached when one comes in, and how to contact them.

**Postal Buddy.** Postal Buddy is made by the team that publishes this site. You take a photo of each letter you get, and Postal Buddy tells you, in big print and out loud, what it is. [^1] The app can read its explanation of a letter out loud. [^1] For a bill, it shows the sender, the amount and the due date. [^1] For a suspected scam, it says not to pay or call the number on it. [^1] The older person does not have to sign in; family helpers sign in. [^1]

## Common mistakes to avoid

- **Acting before asking.** An unfamiliar request that asks for money, a signature or a meeting should go to the trusted person before anything is done.
- **Calling a number on the request.** Find the number yourself; a request you do not know may carry a number that is not the real one.
- **Relying on memory.** Write down what the request says and what was decided, so it is not lost.
- **Giving personal details over the phone.** Card, bank and account numbers should not be given to a caller the person does not know.
- **Keeping the request out of reach.** A paper in the tray or a photo on a phone helps, but a request left elsewhere can be forgotten.
- **Leaving the person with memory loss out.** The explanation is agreed with them, because the help works when they want it.

## Frequently asked questions

### Can Postal Buddy read a letter out loud?

You take a photo of each letter you get and Postal Buddy tells you what it is in big print and out loud. The app can read its explanation of a letter out loud. A person with memory loss does not have to sign in; family helpers sign in. You can try a demo with a made-up family without an account.

### Does Postal Buddy flag a suspected scam?

For a suspected scam, Postal Buddy says not to pay or call the number on it [^1]. When a request asks for money, check the details with a person you trust before acting.

### Is Postal Buddy free to use?

Postal Buddy says the senior's side is free forever. [^1] Plus costs $9.99 a month or $79 a year, with a 30-day Plus trial and no card needed when the first helper joins. [^1] On the free plan, one family member gets a Monday email with how many letters came. [^1]

### Does the person with memory loss need to sign in to Postal Buddy?

No. The older person does not have to sign in; family helpers sign in.

### What is the Monday email in Postal Buddy?

Plus adds a Monday email on what needs doing, what was caught and what changed. [^1] Plus also includes alerts for a scam asking for money, a bill about to go overdue, a government letter, or a bill that jumped. [^1]

Postal Buddy says the senior's side is free forever; Plus costs $9.99 a month or $79 a year, with a 30-day Plus trial and no card needed when the first helper joins. [^1] - [Visit Postal Buddy](/go/start-postalbuddy)

## Sources

[^1]: Postal Buddy's own description of itself (the product of this site's publisher) (/go/start-postalbuddy)